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Lesson 18: The CORE Process-Setting Priorities

Concerns

The CORE Process starts with a focus on immediate Concerns. These can be addressed by interrupting the divorce story; pulling out the threads of concerns and identify which one concern to address first. In starting here, you begin to move towards expanding your thinking and problem-solving capacity.

List your concerns. Write them down and think about each one and write down the many concepts that rush at you like a fire hose, and do not even think about having to have answers for them. Your role is to write out all your concerns.

Options

Options also represent the Path of Self Discovery. This is how you pursue your own answer (often an emotional position on a specific solution) as you explore the only acceptable way for you to meet one or more specific needs. As you walk down the path, be open to keeping the door open to that solution. It may need to be tweaked or you may need to explore another option altogether.

Reflection

The Reflection and Effective Actions turns our attention to how can we help you get through this experience in such a way that you are better prepared for meeting the challenges of the next chapter in your life, perhaps the next relationship, and certainly for their new dependence on yourself for decisions and actions.

After the overwhelm has settled down, THEN you can turn your attention to REFLECTION. This piece focuses on values, underlying beliefs, best self and how you want to show up and move into the next chapter. Reflection promotes greater self-awareness and can create greater clarity, confidence, and courage for the journey ahead.

Reflection might include such questions as:

  • How do you want to feel when you look back on this time?
  • How will your actions during this time inspire others?
  • How do you want to model for your children dealing with difficult times?
  • Who are you when you are at your best as a parent?
  • What is the bigger purpose you can see for yourself?
  • What values are important to you and guide your choices?

As you look ahead to the next chapter, what have you learned about yourself from this experience?

Effective Action

Effective Action will help you achieve command of your facts, stay focused and move forward, communicate more effectively, and being a credible client in the legal process.

  • Making Good Decisions
  • Getting Organized for the Process
  • Getting Through It – The Transition Process
  • Managing Hot Buttons and Turning Conflict Around
  • Taking the High Road
  • Parenting During Divorce
  • Co-Parenting After Divorce
  • Redefining Yourself and Your Environment
  • Letting Go and Allowing Recovery to Happen
  • Knowing when it is time for a New Intimate Relationships
  • New Relationship with Money

©Certified Divorce Coach Program-Divorce Coaching Inc. 

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