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Lesson 38: Planning and Goal Setting

Key Points About Planning and Goal Setting:

As you develop a framework for your goals, trust that you can tap into your experience and wisdom and past success to define what you want and how you will know you have accomplished it.

  1. Define your “Why, How and What” and keep tuned into their bigger picture and best self. This is an invitation to stretch and expand your comfort zone.
  2. Most of the obstacles to accomplishing goals are in mindsets which create obstacle illusions.
  3. It is your role to identify and choose best actions to take to get to a desired goal. Explore the merit of each action.
  4. Focused on the thinking about the problem instead of the problem itself, you can explore the thinking, and self-discover the better actions to take.
  5. Avoiding the four pitfalls of decision making can greatly improve the outcome of decisions in divorce.
  6. Accountability comes from the you, without judgment, identify the gap between what the intention was and what actually happened.

Why Do So Many People Fail at Meeting Their Goals?

To Achieve Your Goals

To accomplish your goals, it is easier to create new habits which support your goals and become just part of what you do and how you think. Such a significant part of our thinking is automatic and is based on patterns of perceiving and reacting that are embedded in our brains neural pathways. And, it is far easier for the brain to create new pathways that to destroy old ones. So that means it is easier to create new habits than to break old habits. The good news is that over time, your old habits will just be pruned off! Let nature take its course as you create new habits.

Fueling the Fire and Getting it Done!

Most people can set a goal and identify how to get from here to there.

Example: We all know how to lose weight – we know how much weight we want to lose, so it is a measurable goal; and we know that to lose weight: eat Less and exercise more! So, why is it such a problem? What is missing? Why do people fail repeatedly to fuel the fire and just get it done?

Maybe it is the WHY! Or, the absence of WHY.

Do you really want to lose weight? Do you really want to go through the discipline of weighing your food, and going to the gym to work out? For most people, that is not the most inspiring thing to think about – and not a habit they have yet developed. And, it takes more energy to change your habits than to operate in your default mode!

Now, add to it a WHY: To have the energy to play with my grandchildren; to be able to join my friends in doing whatever I want and have the stamina to see it through; to be able to walk into any store and drop a size 10 dress over the top of my head, have it easily fall over my hips and look great! To be proud of my photo in the upcoming special occasion!

Now, we start talking about the WHY and fueling the fire and getting it done!

Reflection: What is your WHY for becoming a divorce coach? What bigger impact will it have?

©Certified Divorce Coach Program-Divorce Coaching Inc.


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