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Lesson 39: Creating Good Habits

Here are good habits to develop as you move towards being intentional in creating your life:

  • Keep your WHY in front of you with a physical reminder – a photo, a collages, a symbol of what it will be like when it is realized.
  • Make conscious choices – you define yourself by the choices you make each and every day.
  • Stay focused –focus and intention acts like a magnet to pull resources toward you.
  • Write down your goals SMART – be specific and have a deadline. Put it on your calendar.
  • Plan carefully and mentally rehearse all the steps on the way to achieving your goals.
  • Include others and surround yourself with good people who have solid experiences and ask for their support.
  • Welcome failure – it stops you long enough to re-strategize and figure out how adjust your plans so you can get the results you expected to get but didn’t.
  • Take purposeful action – a plan moves you toward your goals only through action fueled by intention and WHY.
  • Monitor how you are doing – attention increases focus and results tell you how you are doing against your goals.
  • Celebrate your successes – and all the small wins along the way to accomplishing your big goals!
  • Be honest with yourself about where you are in relation to what you said you wanted and add the missing ingredients to get there: WHY, purpose, intention, focus, believing you can, consistent action, support and accountability partners.

1. The benefits to writing your goals down:

  1. It forces you to clearly define what your goals are. It forces clarity.
  2. It frees up room in your mind to take your thinking to the next level.
  3. It is something to monitor and measure your progress against.
  4. Goals in writing provide a structure for holding you accountable for your focus each and every day,

Freeing up space to think about HOW to accomplish the goal:

Freeing up space in your head to think of ways to accomplish your goals comes with writing them down. And, this stimulates creativity and the result is a really good idea with a concrete plan of action that can easily be implemented.

People who never write their goals down always have them stuck in their head, so they have no “room” to think of ideas on how to act on them.

2. Break It Down Into, Small, Doable Pieces….Then Celebrate

B.J. Fogg from Stanford University has developed an approach to changing habits that he calls Tiny Habits. www.tinyhabits.com. His basic formula for behavioral change is the convergence of Motivation, Ability and Trigger. So here is how he suggests starting:

To develop a new habit, he suggests picking 3 actions which have the following characteristics:

  • Something you do at least once a day
  • Takes 30 seconds or less to do
  • Requires little effort

Link each of these tiny habits to something you already do each day and incorporate one of these tiny habits after you do a specific behavior. For example, after I brush my teeth, I take my vitamins. Or, after I turn on the coffee maker, I wipe the counter.

And, when you have completed each tiny habit, you celebrate by saying something out loud – Way to go! Or, raise your arms in a victory “V.” Or, do a happy dance.

Try this for a week. Or, join his weekly commitment http://tinyhabits.com/join/.

Our Favorite book on the subject is Atomic Habits!

Atomic Habits: An Easy & Proven Way to Build Good Habits & Break Bad Ones

No matter your goals, Atomic Habits offers a proven framework for improving – every day. James Clear, one of the world’s leading experts on habit formation, reveals practical strategies that will teach you exactly how to form good habits, break bad ones, and master the tiny behaviors that lead to remarkable results.

If you’re having trouble changing your habits, the problem isn’t you. The problem is your system. Bad habits repeat themselves again and again not because you don’t want to change, but because you have the wrong system for change. You do not rise to the level of your goals. You fall to the level of your systems. Here, you’ll get a proven system that can take you to new heights.

Clear is known for his ability to distill complex topics into simple behaviors that can be easily applied to daily life and work. Here, he draws on the most proven ideas from biology, psychology, and neuroscience to create an easy-to-understand guide for making good habits inevitable and bad habits impossible. Along the way, listeners will be inspired and entertained with true stories from Olympic gold medalists, award-winning artists, business leaders, life-saving physicians, and star comedians who have used the science of small habits to master their craft and vault to the top of their field.

Learn how to:

  • Make time for new habits (even when life gets crazy)
  • Overcome a lack of motivation and willpower
  • Design your environment to make success easier
  • Get back on track when you fall off course
  • And much more

Atomic Habits will reshape the way you think about progress and success, and give you the tools and strategies you need to transform your habits – whether you are a team looking to win a championship, an organization hoping to redefine an industry, or simply an individual who wishes to quit smoking, lose weight, reduce stress, or achieve any other goal.

©Certified Divorce Coach Program-Divorce Coaching Inc.