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Lesson 13: Finding Your Why

He who has a why can endure any how.

Frederick Nietzsche

Knowing your why is an important first step in figuring out how to achieve the goals that excite you and create a life you enjoy living (versus merely surviving!). Indeed, only when you know your ‘why’ will you find the courage to take the risks needed to get ahead, stay motivated when the chips are down, and move your life onto an entirely new, more challenging, and more rewarding trajectory.

When we focus on only ourselves, we focus on everything that has happened to us. When we can see a bigger purpose in our life, work, community, family, then our perspective shifts from the nitty-gritty in front of me, to that bigger purpose that I want for myself, the people I know and even for other I don’t yet know.

Watch the Simon Sinek Video about Starting With Why (also the name of a book on Amazon and identify your WHY in 12 words or so.

4 Questions to Tap Purpose

You can ask sample questions to tap into that bigger picture. Questions suggested by Margie Warrell in Forbes Magazine article:

1. What makes you come alive? (Excited, satisfied, willing to step outside comfort zone?)

2. What are your innate strengths? (Purchase Strengthsfinder 2.0 book and do free strengths assessment using code. Book gives you interpretation of each strength.)

3. Where do you add greatest value? (How are you going to approach your business)

4. How will you measure your life? (What will you accomplish?)

As you keep your eye on your WHY, all the bright shiny objects and other distractions which could deter you from accomplishing your great work, will become smaller so that you can step over them. Your WHY keeps the obstacles in perspective.

Ask yourself these questions:

  • Who is it that you want to be for others?
  • What is it that matters most to you?
  • What is it that you are naturally good at?
  • What inspires you and makes you come alive?
  • What do people turn to you for?
  • Where do you find the greatest sense of meaning in your life?

A shorter why is better because you can say it to yourself when you get up in the morning, let it roll off your tongue if someone asks what you are up to, or remind yourself at the beginning of the day and again at the end of the day – why you are doing what you are doing – keeping your eye on your North Star so you don’t lose your way!

And now, the big question:

What is the gap between where you are right now and that which would fulfill your WHY in this situation?

©Certified Divorce Coach Program-Divorce Coaching Inc.

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